Domino affect

Note:  this blog is of a sensitive nature- about my weight and self esteem.  You were warned.
So I never really lost all of the baby weight after Franklin was born, in fact it yo-yoed down and then back up I would have to say.  I am sure people started to wonder if baby #4 was making a quick debut.  I kept wishing I was secretly pregnant and didn't know it!  Just to explain away the bulge.
I hated the way I looked and kept up the viscous cycle of eating to feel better and then being guilty when I never lost any weight or put more on.  I'm a Dietitian, which made it worse because I SHOULD KNOW BETTER.  I saw every little rationalization and excuse for what it was and that made me feel even worse.

A year ago, I took a first step and bought some new clothes in my correct size that made me feel better about myself.  I started paying more attention to my skin and make-up, getting ready on days I didn't have to be anywhere- this also boosted my self esteem.  About a month ago another mom from school brought me a sample of a skin care product she sells.  I have been amazed- you know all those products that claim you will have smaller pores, your scars will be less visible, you skin will look younger and be more clear?  Well, this is the first product I have ever used where those claims actually came true for me.  I think everyone's skin is so different and often the game of "try one and see" goes on for years and years.

I'll even post a notoriously bad web-cam photo to show you

Anyway, I love this stuff - it's called Nerium.  But what was most interesting is that having my skin clear up and look and feel so much better was a catalyst to my starting to exercise every day.  FINALLY!  After almost 2 years and trying and failing, I am finally on schedule to exercise daily.  And now that I am exercising, I don't want to mess that up by eating bad, so I am watching what I eat a lot more closely.  I am so happy!  I have not magically slimmed down in one week, but I am so happy I am finally turning the corner for taking care of myself.   I think one small step is often what we need to get us on the path of prioritizing our needs.  Take care of yourself.